Tangled and Warped

Entries from May 2008

The Shoebox

May 29, 2008 · 4 Comments

Perhaps some of you have seen this already but I hadn’t so I thought I would share it with you.



A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years.
They had shared everything. They had talked about everything.

They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little
old woman had a shoe box in the top of her closet that she had
cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about.

For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but
one day the little old woman got very sick and the doctor said
she would not recover.
In trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took
down the shoe box and took it to his wife’s bedside.

She agreed that it was time that he should know what was
in the box. When he opened it, he found two knitted dolls
and a stack of money totaling $95,000.

He asked her about the contents. ‘When we were to be married,’

she said, ‘ my grandmother told me the secret of a happy marriage
was to never argue. She told me that if I ever got angry with you,
I should just keep quiet and knit a doll.’

The little old man was so moved; he had to fight back tears. Only two

precious dolls were in the box. She had only been angry with him two

times in all those years of living and loving. He almost burst with

happiness.

‘Honey,’ he said, ‘that explains the doll, but what about all of this money?

Where did it come from?’

‘Oh,’ she said, ‘that’s the money I made from selling the dolls.’


A Prayer…….

Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man;
Love to forgive him, and Patience for his moods.

Because Lord, if I pray for Strength,

I’ll beat him to death, because I don’t have time to knit.

Hmmm maybe I should start knitting dolls and selling them everytime DD pisses me off.

Categories: Family and Friends · Knitting · Life

Getting back to ‘normal’

May 19, 2008 · 6 Comments

Thank you everyone for your warm expressions of sympathy. They really do help. Dad’s memorial service was on Saturday. The sun was out, and it was a beautiful day. I also think it was fitting that it also just happened to be Armed Forces Day. He would have like that. The church was standing room only and there were over 200 people at the luncheon afterwards. It was lovely and perfectly orchestrated by Mom.

I have to say that over the past week, as we pulled together pictures and photos, and spoke to old friends that we hadn’t seen or heard from in eons, we did a lot more laughing than crying.

DD pulled some really horrible stuff on my during this past week… all I can say is I am currently looking for Wilderness Boot Camps for Girls Only to send her to this summer… seriously.

Since I couldn’t really think about anything hard, but needed to keep my hands busy I have almost a pair of socks completed. I really should have been working on my shawl, but I just couldn’t think that hard all week.

Mom had us running back and forth and screaming at people including us. We realized that she was tired and grieving in her own way, but my sister and I were <this> close to duct taping her up and tossing her into the back seat of my cousin Jen’s car so that we could get a reprieve this week.

Cindy and I also decided that if Mom ever needs to go into a nursing home that she is going to love Albuquerque.

All I can say it thank the gods for overly developed coping skills, this past week would have pushed a lesser person right off the deep end.

Now we just have the gathering of the clan to look forward to. At least that isn’t until July so I have plenty of time to squeeze in some therapy, tequila and lots of knitting. I’m going to let my cousin Tom handle these arrangements with Mom - just a little Military Interment Service at the Family cemetery in upstate NY… should be a breeze.

Categories: Family and Friends · Knitting · Life

My Dad

May 13, 2008 · 16 Comments

“Now cracks a noble heart. Good night, sweet prince,
And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest!”

I’ve been agonizing how to say goodbye to the person who was always there when we faltered, and who always provided us with the port in the storm.

He gave us a wonderful life. He gave us a wonderful family, my mom Shirley, his wife of almost 56 years, my sister Cindy, brother James, and of course his beloved grandkids, Kristine, Eric, Grace and Jeffery Robert.

How do you say goodbye to a man who left a long trail of memories that span over more than 81 years.

Robert Harold Chantler was born in Oneonta, New York August 29, 1926 to Harold and Bessie Chantler. His sister Gladys was 10 years older so although she often served as a surrogate Mom, they enjoyed a very close loving relationship. He grew up during the depression in Sidney, NY and at the age of 17 he convinced his mother to give her permission for her only son to join the US Navy during WWII, where he served on the USS Heywood L. Edwards, DD663

My sister loved this photo and as a little girl would always ask to see the picture of Dad with the “bar of soap” on his head.

When he returned after serving for 19 months in the Pacific, he finished High School and went on to Ithaca College on the GI Bill. This is where he met and married my Mom.

As kids we spent every holiday and most Sunday afternoons, with the Chantler clan and there was always lots of good food, lots of card playing and lots and lots of laughter and always lots of love.

Dad lived and loved with great passion mixed with lots of humor.

I don’t think I can ever remember a time where Dad couldn’t find humor in any situation, and often it was irreverent, which may explain how Dad saw life, with optimism and humor. There were few things in life that Dad didn’t love including mischief and mayhem. He was the first one you would suspect if you became the victim of one of his practical jokes. He was never malicious, and it was always in good fun. If you ever managed to pull one off on him, which was rare, he always laughed the hardest and loudest. All while planning his next move.

How do you say goodbye to one of the strongest people I’ve ever known, I only remember seeing him cry once and that was when my brother James became very ill as a newborn, of course at the time I thought it was because I had broken the buckle on my new shoes. But Dad was there day and night, sometimes he seemed to be every where at once, like when my sister was born and she and my mom were in one hospital, and I just happened to be sick with pneumonia in another hospital. Poor Dad spent at least a week, just running back and forth from hospital to hospital with little or no sleep.
How to say goodbye to the Dad who taught me everything I ever needed to know. I remember one day when I was around 8 or 9 I ran home crying because one of the neighborhood kids had pushed me off a swing. He looked me in the eye, showed me how to make a proper fist, and sent me off to ‘take the swing back’. I did.

Dad had many careers in his life, and because of this we moved a lot. Like gypsies, Dad would move to a new job, and Mom would be the one to pack us up and drive to the new location with three kids and a dog in tow. Because we moved so much, I always assumed that it was those experiences that taught us how to make friends fast. But I see now that it wasn’t the moves, it was probably a gene we got from Dad.

Although he had many jobs that took him all over the world, I think his most exciting one when he became the Program Manager for the Apollo Lunar Landing Module (LEM) simulator. That simulator became crucial in helping to get the men of Apollo 13 back safe and sound.
I am so honored that I was able share with my sister and mom, Dad’s final journey, to be there and to be able to hear him say I love you sweetie just one more time.

But like Winston Churchill I know he was prepared to meet his Maker, but I am not so sure his Maker is ready to meet him.

As I started trying to pull this together I came upon this obscure line from Hamlet

“He was a man, Take him for his all, I shall not look upon his like again.”

I love you too Dad.

If you feel so inclined please send a donation to the Fisher House Foundation, Inc.

Categories: Family and Friends · Life

Power to the people

May 8, 2008 · 7 Comments

It’s amazing what the power of positive energy can do.  Thank you all for sending all that get better energy to my Dad.  He is not only home from the hospital but up and about and feeling like his old self.  I guess at 82 feeling like your ‘old’ self beats the alternatives.

Mom is still heading to PA Friday and returning early on Sunday morning, but neither of them seem to think Dad needs any supervision, other than having the neighbors occasionally check on him.  My sister and still plan on checking in by phone and we plan on going down to have dinner with him on Saturday.  There is still a chance that this can all change at the drop of a hat, but right now it looks like the NH Sheep and Wool is back on!  YAHOO!

So keeping my fingers crossed, right now the plan is to get up there early for the opening, check out the pot luck picnic lunch - although I probably won’t be bringing any pot to share, nor will I be staying for lunch, I will just stop and say hello to everyone.  Then head out early so I can get home and get some stuff done before Sis and I head down to Dad’s.

I cannot stay long there either because if I am gone too long the house quickly gets overrun with teenagers.  They are harder to get rid of than roaches I swear and a lot more destructive.

Darling Daughter has decided she hates me and doesn’t want to live with me anymore and at first i was hurt.  But at this point I told her if she can find a responsible adult that wants to take her I’ll talk.  LOL! Like that is going to happen.  But just in case there is a responsible adult reading this blog that really wants a bipolar, depressed, hormone raging, OCD, Hoarding teenager, drop me a line, we’ll talk.

And the therapists all wonder why I have over developed coping skills :)

Obligatory knitting content…

I have finished all but the buttons on the BSJ - still looking for something that works.

I have started a pair of plain stockinette socks hoping to get my sock mojo back.

I haven’t touched the lace shawl, but I did join another Goddess Mystery Shawl KAL.  I know I need that like I need another ball of sock yarn but what the heck.

As of next month I will be officially part of the Studio on Western Avenue, paying real rent.  Cindy and I have lots of plans to organize it and make some nice ‘retail’ space right in the studio.  It’s not great for retail, so if you are so inclined you can check out some of the fiberlicious stuff that is available by clicking on the link in the sidebar.

Oh and another upcoming fiber event that I will most likely be attending is the Annual Colonial Spinning Bee.  I am planning on bringing some of my hand dyed fibers to sell so I hope to see some of you there.

Categories: Bitchn · Family and Friends · Knitting and Spinning · Life

Bleeding Hearts

May 6, 2008 · 2 Comments

First, thank you everyone for your kind thoughts, wishes and prayers for my Dad.  Last night Mom said she thought he was coming home, but I had my doubts.  Sure enough today they have a bunch of ’specialists’ in to look him over.   Dad still insists that he DOES want heroic measures to keep him going.  But this goes against what he actually does, like eating hot fudge sundaes and drinking alcohol when you are diabetic.  I want to kick his butt right now, but I can’t.

Mom is hanging in there and we are still trying to figure out away to get her down to PA for her sister’s birthday.   And since my sister will be doing the Andover Craft Fair as usual on Saturday.   My best chance for getting to the NH Sheep and Wool will most likely be Sunday, but right now I am not counting on making it up there this year.  And I’m ok with that.  It’s not like I have huge amounts of disposable income to spend on fiberlicious stuff and there is nothing I absolutely positively need and can only get there either.

If it doesn’t pan out then there is always Webs Annual Fiber Sale next weekend…  it’s spring - there is always a fiber fix somewhere! hehehe

Last night was so beautiful out, and NO BUGS (yet), so I did the walk around to see what’s coming up.

My hydrangea vine is going to town, as was the bleeding heart in front of it.  I say was because this morning I came out the door and it looked like someone had sat in the middle of it.  I am so going to kill that cat!

This is the view off the back deck facing due north.  That forsythia was just a few skinny branches that I had pulled out of my sister’s yard 10 years ago.   On the other side of the trees is the wet lands.  Already I’ve seen 2 blue herons so they are nesting somewhere back there.

Last but not least is my damn lilac bush - look at it closely as it is the last time you will see it.  I planted a slip of a lilac 15 years ago.  It comes back every year, bigger and bigger.  I trim the suckers,  water and feed it and for 15 years not one damn lilac blossom, not ONE!  So come fall, I’m digging the damn lilac bush up and giving it to a friend.  It pains me as I have wanted a blooming lilac bush forever, but I am tired of dumping different potions and plant food suggestions from various landscapers, and nursery specialists.  I’ve tried whacking the stems as otherssuggested when they have shared their ‘old wives tale’ secrets for getting Lilacs to bloom.  But nothing so far as worked, and it doesn’t look like it will be blooming this year either.

Knitting:

I finished knitting the bsj, I still need to sew up the seams, weave in the ends, block and find buttons for it.

Categories: Knitting and Spinning

Running and getting nowhere

May 5, 2008 · 6 Comments

This weekend I had so many plans but most got dropped when Mom called on Friday morning to say Dad was back in the hospital.  We knew he hadn’t felt well for awhile and when you are 82 that is kind of expected some days.  But when my sister checked with the Dr. and the doctor starts with “well you know your Dad has lived beyond his life expectancy, and he has several issues….”  it doesn’t bode well, so we dropped what we were doing and headed down to the hospital.

He actually looked better because they had given him a few pints of blood and it made him at least look healthier.  For some reason his body isn’t making blood.  It doesn’t help that he’s been diagnosed with both systolic and diastolic heart failure.  And the medications aren’t really helping.  He also had diabetes which he refuses to modify his diet to accommodate, and with a sweet tooth this is not good either.

So until they get him a bit more stablized he’s in the hospital for awhile.   If you think of it, keep him in your thoughts.  Thanks!

Saturday since Dad was having several tests, and would probably sleep in between, we decided to go ahead with open studio day at Western Avenue Studios.

Bead and Fiber Babe, Amanda stopped by and picked up some of my lovely hand dyed finn roving.  She recently acquired a spinning wheel.  Check out what she did with the Finn roving here.  Didn’t she do a fabulous job?

Cindy was there giving lessons to some lovely ladies on weaving.

Check out the lovely scarves they finished while they were there!

Fantastic job!

Note the triangular loom in the background.  Cindy has been working this loom for about 6 months now - all right, all ready - finish it so I can make one too!  I spent the entire day spinning (sorry I didn’t take pics , I know BAD BLOGGER!)

Saturday night my friend Nancy came over for dinner.  She was supposed to come over Friday night, but with Dad in the hospital we had postponed it.  We had a lovely dinner of Delmonico Rib eyes, baked potatoes, and salad and I had a couple of nice cocktails too.  Thanks Nancy!  Then apple pie later.  It took a while to get the teenagers to leave but they finally did.

Sunday, it was grey and dismal out.  By the time I woke up it was pouring rain and all I could think of was that my poor sister and nephew were out there doing the Walk for Hunger.  Eric is ‘this’ close to finishing up all the badges for Eagle Scout.

Up and at ‘em Grace and I went back down to the hospital to see Dad so, no knitting at the Peddler’s Daughter in Nashua.  We were going to use the tickets mom had for an afternoon play (Street Car Named Desire) but Grace was being a total brat and Dad was sleepy so I sent Mom off to the play with her friend ‘B’ and we hung out with Dad while he had some lunch.  After lunch he was getting sleepy again, so I got his pillows plumped and got him settled and tucked in, then Grace and I skedaddled out of there to get some errands done.

Within moments of arriving home the gaggle of teens descended on the house.  But they left early enough that I got so hang in my jammies to watch some TV and get some knitting in.  I am almost finished with the Baby Surprise Jacket - I ran out of my handspun with just 3 rows left :(  I have something complimentary that will work, but still it ticked me off.

I am still hoping to get to the NH Sheep and Wool festival this coming weekend - but that all depends on Dad and where he is.  Mom had been planning on going to PA for her sister’s birthday, but that is all on hold too.

Categories: Family and Friends · Knitting and Spinning · Life

Beltane and The Return of Persphone

May 1, 2008 · No Comments

1891 Frederic Leighton - The Return of Persephone

A delicate fabric of bird song
Floats in the air,
The smell of wet wild earth
Is everywhere.
Oh I must pass nothing by
Without loving it much,
The raindrop try with my lips,
The grass with my touch;
For how can I be sure
I shall see again
The world on the first of May
Shining after the rain?
- Sara Teasdale, May Day

And so begins the merry month of May.

Categories: Knitting and Spinning

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